You may be clinging to the past if you're still blaming your parents, your ex, your significant other or your 3rd grade teacher for anything that isn't working in your life today.
You may be clinging to the past if you believe your old dishwasher works when it really doesn't.
That's where I am today.
I have to pre-wash the dishes before they go in, which absolutely defeats the purpose of having a dishwasher in the first place.
I'm happy to say that I (think) I'm finally moving out of the denial phase and realizing that we either need to call our local repair guy or get a new dishwasher.
Because I'm an improviser, there are a zillion options, really, now that I've finally accepted life's offer of a broken dishwasher.
Onstage, doing an improv scene, it would've been much easier and much quicker. My scene partner might've said, "Honey this dishwasher isn't working. I've run the dishes through twice and they're still as dirty as they were before."
"You're right, " I'd answer, "It's time to call that repair man who worked his voodoo magic on our fridge last year."
Oh and the scene could move on quite nicely from there.
But, in the improv of life, it's often harder to accept what's happening and move forward.
As if our very existence depended up on it, we cling to beliefs, situations and people that are no longer necessary or are carrying us to unhappiness and danger.
Life rafts aren't intended to be lived upon. They are merely there until we can get to something better.
Some folks get on a life raft and paddle away, making slow progress towards the shore. They do what they can to survive until they finally reach dry land. Sometimes, these life rafts to which we cling are soooooo close to shore but we're so busy surviving on the raft, we don't even realize it. Everyone on dry land can see we're only in a few inches of water and if we'd just let go and stand up, we'd walk to the new opportunities right next to us! Once we finally stand up and slog those last few feet into shore, we feel amazing!! That's where I am with the dishwasher, I've been merely surviving instead of moving on to what I know needs to happen.
But, some people clamber onto that life raft of denial and think they're home free. They refuse to believe they're stuck in the sea and just try to live the way they always have. They ignore all warnings, refuse all offers for assistance as others watch helplessly as that life raft heads to deeper waters.
How many life rafts are supporting your denial?
Which of life's offers are you blocking in order to stay put and not move forward into a new place?
In the improv of life, is staying stuck more comfortable than moving forward?
What is it costing you or your organization?
I've seen people lose their jobs in a layoff because they'd spent the last 10 months refusing to use and/or learn a new way of doing something. They just bobbed along on their life raft, doing it the "old" way because they just wouldn't accept the new. Then when the life raft was ripped out from under them they were stunned to find themselves in a place they didn't like.
I've seen organizations push away eager volunteers and slowly spiral downward because too many folks refused to acknowledge that it was time to let go of one or two toxic people or the "old" way of doing things. One-by-one, new volunteers would come in, work to make positive changes, and leave when they realized that all their hard work was being undermined by that one person who'd been "a volunteer forever". The organization was clinging to the old times as the entire raft sank into the sea.
So, I've been breaking the rules. I've been blocking what life has offered by refusing to believe there's anything wrong with my dishwasher, even though it's been working like crap since the beginning of summer. That's the life raft to which I've been clinging.
I guess I'm clinging to the past because I really liked this dishwasher. We have a tiny house and we went to the trouble of special-ordering a smaller model than is usually sold in stores. I guess I'm clinging to the past and living in denial because it is going to cost me money and time.
But, when I look at the situation objectively, I see that the fact that its broken is costing me money and time, too. I'm wasting hot water (money) and standing there washing them by hand (time).
So, today, I'm accepting the offer that life has thrown. Time for a new dishwasher!
How many life rafts are supporting you denial?
Which of life's offers are you blocking in order to stay put and not move forward into uncomfortable territory.
Is staying stuck more comfortable than moving forward?
What is it costing you or your organization?
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